Any dating tips for someone with Asperger's?

I have a mild form of autism known as Asperger's Syndrome. It has indeed affected my ability to interact with other people. I was just about to give up on the dating scene when a classmate beckoned the call. Everywhere I look, the young girls are attracted to the bad boys with fat egos, millions of tattoos, and muscle cars. All the while they're terrified of me, when it should be the other way around. Most of those self-centered jocks are usually charming other girls along the side. It's not like women come with a manual full of instructions, you know? So here's the scoop. This girl I'm being set up with also has Asperger's. I haven't been involved with anyone for five years, so I'm rather nervous. Every female I dated was a neurotypical moreover. I'm excited yet skeptical at the same time because I have no idea what to expect dating one of my own kind. Is there anybody out there who has any suggestions?Any dating tips for someone with Asperger's?
Yeah, suggest talking about it with her. Tell her some stories of your experiences with AS, tell her you are nervous and haven't been involved with anyone for awhile.





Be aware of what your quirky AS symptoms are. Try not to interrupt, try to listen, try to look in her general direction, though having AS too she probably won't be turned off if you are talking looking elsewhere when neurotypicals think this is rude. EYE CONTACT is completely over-rated and people on the spectrum don't care or notice if you don't have it so don't stress yourself out trying to force yourself to look her in the eye because it just doesn't matter to us. Try to be aware if you are going on and on and she looks bored. Ask her about herself. Do something fun, if you can handle dinner that is good but if you are too anxious to eat around people suggest something else.





Ya know when neurotypicals give you that WTF look? Here is the perfect example, when a neurotypical asks you how are you doing, how's it going or something of that nature and you do not answer with the societal norm of fine, ok, could be better but actually answer the q, and they all look at you like you have two heads. Those on the spectrum 'get it' and you won't get that from them. She also won't think your word choices are odd and stop and make a big deal about using words like beckoned, moreover, or debacle.





I really like AS people, I find them easier to deal with than neurotypicals (I have AS). I also connect easily to bipolar/schizophrenics though I don't have those.





I'm not getting what deaf people have to do with anything, yes they communicate differently but don't have a communication disorder, as a hearing person I find that offensive for the deaf community.





Ah, idk about the zoo. My sensory issues don't make that trip enjoyable at all. Those that are hyper olfactory- the smell of hippos is nauseating.





I disagree on the arcades too, sensory overload!





Suggest exchanging some info with her prior to the date via e-mail, much less stressful than the phone.Any dating tips for someone with Asperger's?
Just relax as much as possible and have fun. You sound very well spoken and intelligent, so don't stress. If this girl is a good match for you it'll all work out fine. Any first date should be in a relaxed atmosphere that both of you will be comfortable in. Arcades are fun (everyone likes to Whack-A-Mole), or casual lunch (if both of you want you can make further plans, or cut your losses). Just remember us girls wish guys came with instructions too.
be yourself and be extra polite. you'll do just fine. and again with the chicks liking the bad boys, its been my experience that guys like the mean girls. remember we had this conversation. just be yourself and treat her how you would want to be treated chances are she is feeling the same thing you are.and about the my own kind remark, you don't have three eyes and six legs. you are no different than anybody else.and neither is she.remember be yourself and have a good time
Stop making such a big deal out of it! You have your five senses - be grateful! I am learning Sign Language and work with deaf people. They communicate with everyone and don't worry about 'sticking to ' their kind.


Just have fun and enjoy yourself! Talk about interesting subjects and listen to her opinions.


All the best and I am holding thumbs!


Btw - completely agree - men and women with tattoos are a huge turnoff and I can't understand why some women date such machos.
This might actually turn out nice for you. Try not to take over all the conversation. My son has aspergers and tends to do that. She might do that as well. Be patient. Share your experiences with aspergers but if she doesn't want to talk about that, find something else that you can talk about that she might enjoy. Just take your time and try to enjoy it. Talk about her interests also. If you are afraid of the conversation, go to a movie, make sure it is one you both like.
in high school i dated a young man that i believe had A.S. and we had a fine time. our first date wasn't a typical one for someone of high school age. instead of going to the movies or something on that vein, we went on a nature hike and took a picnic lunch with us.





don't be nervous, be who you are, and above all have a good time!!!
Wait for a girl who has equal intelligence, very hard to be with someone who is not an equal in intellect, believe me I've tried- and it can't work unless you like feeling like you're sacrificing part of yourself to be with someone. BTW, um, is that icon photo who I think it is?
Good for you! My youngest son was dx w/ autism when he was barely 18mths. Social Issues have always been something we are working on. Just be yourself! If you have to change for someone then they are not worth being with. Stay strong the right person is out there!
Make eye contact and meaningful conversation
I'd go to the water animals section of a zoo with her. I don't know any girl Aspies who don't love water. Or a natural history museum, especially like the kind in Cincinnati where you walk through caves, or something else awesome and kinda free and interesting. You can just walk around with her and get to know her without having to sit and feel confined and unrelaxed, pressured to say certain things or act a certain way. You get to see if she is the kind of person you'd hang out with any other day, and it's public so if she is too off....well, people saw you with her! :D I'm guessing a friend is setting up the blind date or else you might not go.... Good luck!
hi. I have aspergers syndrome as well, as well as ADD and other maladies. It has affected my ability to interact with people, who always thought I was strange. My advice to you is to try and find the girl who everyone else thinks is strange for some reason or other. You may be surpirsed, I'd sooner date a strange boy than a stupid one, and you sound pretty intelligent to me. Do you like manga, or anime? The way I found my best friend on life is by apporaching a gorl who was reading a manga series I was fond of, and we hit it off right away. if a boy ever did that to me, I'd think him to be sweet, charming, and ablw to look past reputation. yes girls typically like ';this kind of guy';(although I see them and my head screams eww), but you'd be surprised to find out how amny girls are looking for something out of the ordinary.

















Now, as for the own kind business, people with autism usually have narrow interest,(I know I do) so just find something you guys both love, and talk about it!
must be a little nerve wracking going on a blind date never mind having a.s and going on a blind date





if she has a.s too, then she will be aware of the 'eccentricites' you wil probably convey and have





dotn exepct anything from her, or yourself, just try, thats all you can do, both of you, try to talk to each other, try to communciate as best as you both can, and if it gets awkward, just say, hey, its ok that its liek this, this is actually normal for ANY blind date





try to do soemthing that will mean you get to enjoy things and open up , be yourself,





in general dating tips are always the say whether you have a.s or not, but the communciation issue is the most prevalant issue, the one that will have the most problems





as you both have it, you are BOTH aware of that, which is quite important and very good for you





as apposed to you dating soemone who isnt aware of what to expect


so you are both 'prepared' and so hopefully can be a bit more at ease





other than that io have no real advice


i think terri has a good point in what she says








good luck and have a good time ;-)